Monthly Archives: January 2006


As a method of distraction over the last few days I have succumbed to the lure of ‘Lego Star Wars’ and am currently chuckling away at how sad I am whilst deciding whether I want to be ‘Darth Maul’ or ‘R2D2’ for one of many challenges in the game!

Give me a good telling off and send me off reading or writing as this is just… I don’t even know!


Geek Time!

You scored 40 Holy, 52 Tactful, 77 Natural, and 55 Arcane!
Your eye flutters for a second and the world loses focus… when clarity returns you realize that the only person in the room who wasn’t knocked unconscious is holding his temples and writhing on the ground. Nobody knows what you just did, even you, but you know it happened because you made it happen. You have taught reality that your desires are more important than it’s fickle laws (or you can, rather). You are one of the rare psionicists, the masters of mind over matter. Your approach to problems is a rare blend of intuition, force of personality, and careful planning. You’re all right in a fight, but can really hold your own only once you’ve stacked the laws of this universe on your side. Thankfully, with practice, you can do this with ease. Hmm, my guess is that you’re a bit lacking ethically speaking however… just a guess though, creep.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

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You scored higher than 37% on Godliness
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You scored higher than 54% on Tact
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You scored higher than 69% on Harmony
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You scored higher than 75% on Arcane

Link: The Which D & D Class am I Test written by effataigus on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Number Six

First Greg mentioned it and yesterday came up with exactly the same theory, which is:

On the albums that you count as top quality check out track number 6, as it is invariably one of the best (if not the best) on the album.

I’m curious to see what others think of this and I’m now off to go through track listings on some of my favourite cds…

For Mum

Wondering why

yet with forbearing acceptance

we say farewell

ending the road

that we traversed together


Bravely lost was the war

many battles won

though infected

infectious was the laugh

that will be remembered


Life was to be lived

friends to be made

love was given freely


and hearts have been broken


Passions transferred

have served me well

striving for betterment

accomplishments achieved

your words ring still


Though our road is no more

another takes its place

where you must deliver the message

I gave you for another

that too is yours

For those interested in the wonderful world of football

The Euro 2008 draw has just been made and as an England fan I am very very happy with the draw.

Euro 2008 draw

My commiserations to Scotland and Northern Ireland as there is no way you will be progressing in this tournament.

In Limbo

Returning from hanging up baby clothes in our apartment block’s drying room (the clothes are borrowed from relatives) I was hit by pangs of loss and feelings of expectancy at the same time. The loss, naturally, was for my mother as I tried to imagine her going through the same motions of preparing for her first child (me) and wondering how she felt about it all. Was she scared (she should have been as she was only sixteen!), was she proud, excited, curious, regretful (single mum, living with parents in 1970 conservative England)?

I asked her about some of these things when we visited at Christmas and received some answers, yet not enough and now there are no more answers, there are only guesses. I have to imagine what I think my mum went through, dealt with and had to endure as she prepared for that first child. There were three people in that house the day I was brought home to my new family and they are now all gone: Grandma in 1983 (49 years old), Grandad in 2002 (71 years old) and Mum in 2006 (52 years old).

I feel robbed of memories; they say that we tend not to remember things earlier than the age of four in our own lives and have to rely on others to tell our story. Where then are my bards, my narrators; who will tell the tale of my early years for my wife and child?

Baby is coming soon and I am terrified; not in a damaging way but positive (I hope) as I am terrified of being the worst father in the world. The fear of this should help me to avoid that particular title (although a ‘friend’ mentioned recently that someone has to assume the role… ). I have been warmed by many of my female friends expressing that they think I’ll be a good father, some stating it is due to the fact that have many female qualities and one even stating that she has the best father in the world and so she should know!

It is a limbo time, time to grieve but also to wait and I feel that this was why the events of this year have transpired as they have. I need this time to deal with mum’s death so that I can fully enjoy the birth of my child and not be consumed by feelings of guilt at experiencing joy when I have lost the woman who bore me.

Goodbye Mum and hello baby…

Last night I dreamt you’d died
I woke up and I cried  
Clearlake: Dreamt that you Died (from the album ‘Amber’ 2006)

To be continued…

The A-Z of music

A couple of weeks ago I was speaking to my good friend Greg, who mentioned that he was compiling cds based on an a-z of artists he was a fan of. The more he talked about his thoughts and musings whilst working out who would be on his cds I couldn’t help thinking about a similar a-z, yet this time of songs.

And then, yesterday, I received a couple of cds from kateyschultz which were… yes an artists a-z compilation (well a-m but n-z is coming) and I decided that I am going to do my cd.

So a little offer for people reading my LJ on a regular basis is that anyone who is interested in receiving this compilation (when it is done) only has to let me know of their desire for a funky, yet anal, collection and when recorded I will contact you again to get your postage details.

So watch this space!

Manchester United won 2-1 (3-2 overall) yay!!

The lesser of two evils

B*stard (Blackburn) Rovers are one goal down to Manchester United in the second leg of the League Cup semi-final (makes it 1-2 overall) and that’s a score I would like to see stay as it is for the next hour or so.

It makes me feel a little ill to cheer on Manchester United PLC but against the Rovers, there isn’t really a choice.

Post note: Blackburn scored the equaliser just as I finished this… gaaah!

It can’t be… can it?

I’ve just found myself humming away to two artists that I really shouldn’t be entertaining… what is going on?

No of course I’m not going to tell you who they are, cause you’ll laugh!

My second publication

I received my copies of my latest publication yesterday (and rather shiny they are too!).

It’s official, I have been published again!

A little ray of light in a month filled with sorrow…

Something Changed