Monthly Archives: September 2008

Sometimes those monkey bunch fingers of mine are a little too quick for my own good…

Today my skill on the computer rose to new heights when I set about organising my e-mail addresses and inadvertently deleted 1,964  e-mails from both my Thunderbird and my Gilgamesh Press e-mail account.

If you’ve sent me anything there and wonder why I haven’t got back to you soon, you know why.

I think most of them were mails that I had dealt with and just had for storage but you just never know.

Anyone in England with Virgin broadband?

Then I feel very sorry for you. I heard three instances of their famous disconnection issues and after spending a few days with my sister and family, I was ready to chuck their computer out the window!

Been back a few days now but haven’t got into my stride yet, as I arrived late Wednesday night and then Etina was off at the Gothenburg book fair all day Thursday and most of Friday.

We then got an offer from a colleague of Etina, which was a free night in a Stockholm hotel. We packed Saturday monrning and set off to the capital. maddoc_deniz was in his element and kept saying Mama and Papa all the time, as it was the first couple of days in over a week he had us together. He has photos too over at his journal, check them out.

I managed my first night of unbroken sleep in two weeks last night, I went from eleven to six thirty and it feelt glorious – I even feel like I’m getting back on track.

Getting ready for the launch of Voices on Saturday over in Oz and even though I won’t be there I’m still getting involved in the preparation. The schedule looks fun and I really wish I was able to attend this one:

Conflux 5

Etina started her maternity leave this morn and had long lie-in (she just got up). She is relaxing in style with last night’s episode of Desperate Housewives (oh, the horror).

I need to get some major work tidy up done as I start my initial paternity leave in a couple of weeks too and I want to be as ready for that as I can.

Hope you’re all having fun on this Monday morn.

Stage one of the nothingness

Decided to update here and then realised I have about five minutes before I go and pick up the boy. We are off for a mundane shopping trip and then to do whatever he wants to before bed. I’m looking forward to this as this will be the best part of the day.

I don’t get it, I have a pretty swish looking business, a wife I adore, a son who makes my day so often and some lovely friends around me. In terms of where you should be in life, I’m looking pretty good, as my best friend said, ‘you’re living the dream Mark’.

Cool, so why do I feel so fucking empty?

I don’t know what’s going on but I’m not happy, I’m not rolling with it, I’m just attaching myself to all the stuff that has gone wrong recently and focusing on that. I want to say, ‘just concentrate on the good stuff’ of which there is masses and I know you would say the same.

But I’m not. I need to think long and hard about where I’m going and what the bloody hell I want. I have a baby on the way in three weeks and I don’t want to become a father again whilst like this. Hell I don’t want Etina and Maddoc to have to deal with me like this either.

Right, off to pick the heir up, I hope to continue this later, as much for me as for you…

Back… I think…

I am back in Sweden now, getting my head around this pile of stuff in front of me and wondering if I can become a master of FIFA 08 just before FIFA 09 comes out (next Friday).

Caught up with Supernatural (first two episodes of the fourth season), which was tops and the first episode of season three of Heroes, which was rubbish, and, unless my memory fails (which it may well do) has a massive continuity guff in it.

Maddoc is making me smile but I only saw Etina briefly yesterday morn, as she left for the Gothenburg book convention early on. I’m looking forward to seeing her tonight.

More later… when I shake the mush out of my ears…

One thing starting off another

I’ve been wanting to post for a few days but haven’t gotten around to it, stuff keeps coming up, mostly of my own making and today I have just had to force myself.

I fly to England tomorrow and I’m very much looking forward to this trip, being as it is the Fantasy Con and the launches of The Even and How to Make Monsters (with Voices as a pre-launch offer). I’m also looking forward to seeing my sister and family again and there’s already a day excursion planned with my niece and nephew, so that should be fun. It’s actually the last time I’ll stay in the house where I grew up, as my sister has sold it in preparation of her move here in a month or so.

Been a thoughtful and melancholic morning after the news of Richard Wright. Julia Dream just played and that one did make me sob, seeing as not only was Wright involved in that but Barrett sung it, and his death affected me muchly two years ago. I know the biggy for me is going to be Roger Waters and it’s going to sting with the added knowledge that, due to having a big argument with Etina last summer, I refused to go to see him in Stockholm with her and my brother-in-law, Fuat.

So I’m like a jumbled mash today: very excited about the England trip and launching our first three books, meeting lots of people I really want to meet, spending time with the family, to also thinking about the recent Floyd tragedy and of Fuat and of the demolition of the family home (as it’s being knocked down to make way for new flats).

But I’m good, overall I’m good. The weekend was spent moving the cot back into our bedroom (from up in the attic) and moving the study/office from the bedroom into the living room (which looks a lot better than I thought, being as our living room is huge) and moving the piano from the living room into the bedroom.

I freed up quite a bit of space with my moving around of stuff and even though it doesn’t look anywhere near as cosy and welcoming as it did when we had been here a couple of years, it still looks pretty good and will now do us for another year or so, as when baby moves out of the bedroom, we REALLY have to move.

Oh god, If, is playing – now I am a mess…

“If I were alone, I would cry”

“There is no dark side of the moon really, it’s all dark”

Richard Wright, founding member of Pink Floyd, died of cancer yesterday, age 65.


Being as music is the biggest thing for me, and being as the Floyd are my favourite artists, this is an incredibly sad day.

That Susie Hawes is a bit of a whizz!

When she’s not promoting our company on her own blog, Susie (ghostposts) is spamming me with e-mails about all these new networks for business and such!

Here’s the latest, a little site called LinkedIn:

View Mark S. Deniz's profile on LinkedIn

It’s rather a swish little button that one!

A couple of days I could have done without

It’s weird because work-wise things have been going well for me so it was maybe time that the personal had to have a kick.

A couple of you were asking where I was last night and I’d sort of had enough. I called a friend (as promised) and then watched an episode of Stargate SG-1. I’m not that impressed just now but am told it will get better. I think I’m looking out for something close to BSG and this (and Farscape) come nowhere near at all.

Anyway, what’s been going on then?

Well we found out earlier in the week that the murderer has actually appealed to the high court. His appeal was rejected on the grounds that he was too late but he has appealed that and so there is a chance that there will be a third and final trial. That’s not actually the problem, as I would prefer that it went to a third trial as there is no way he is getting off, meaning he can only get what he already has (ten years) or get life, which he was so close to getting last time.

No, the problem is that the Deniz family’s lawyer didn’t think it was worth mentioning that he’d appealed, because that’s not what you need to do as a lawyer is it? It was only because Etina’s sister had to contact the court regarding another matter that we found out.

The second was when Etina contacted the Assyrian TV channel to ask why they have taken so long sending us the DVD of Fuat’s funeral that they promised. The deal was that they were allowed to film the ceremony as long as we received it afterwards. The news she got was disturbing to say the least when they informed her that Fuat’s widow had already been sent the DVD a couple of months ago. When we discussed the DVD with Runa, before the funeral, she said that we could do whatever, as she wasn’t interested.

Her memories are not photos or DVDs, as she tends to remember them her way [insert 3 hour speech here about how she remembers] but now has taken the DVD and refuses to give it to us (or do us a copy) as punishment for Etina and her father for lying to her.

Basically she hated the family before Fuat’s death and she hates us much more now. She has always had a problem with the culture, which I understand, but the way she goes about it is vile.

We went to the hospital to check on baby and baby seems fine but for the fact I had to take a sample in this morning for testing, as they think Etina has an infection. This is something that could affect baby. They didn’t act too concerned about it but you can’t help but worry and the journey home was a little more sombre than usual.

My toughest moment was just after we’d got in and the midwife said to Etina “Are you stressed?” and Etina nodded. She then asked “Are you often stressed?” and Etina said “Yes.” She’s much better now than she was when we met but it still pains me that she has not been able to calm down, especially when she needs to.

I have a few things I need to do work-wise today but I can’t seem to get motivated.

“He makes Cheney look like Gandhi”

The more I hear about this man (and his team) the less I want to:

Please don’t vote for them, please give me hope that the US can sort itself out.

And lo and it is music and lo it is freely given to thou that art on mine friends list

All stemming from a chat about my music memorabilia CD of the 80s, available with both words and music somewhere on this journal.

It was one of my padawans mylefteye, who mentioned that the 80s weren’t exactly strong for music and named a lot of bands that didn’t have a lot of substance. Although I agree with him in principal, there was much goodness that came out of the 80s. It was Factory’s heyday for one.

Factory Records were created in Manchester and released lots of top quality stuff. I won’t go into the ins and outs of the company here, as that would take all day but they were responsible for bringing three of my favourite bands into the public realm: New Order, Joy Division and ACR (A Certain Ratio).

I thought I’d just put together a few of my fave tunes from a collection Factory Records put together in 1991, entitled Palpatine Palatine (the company office was on Palatine Road in Manchester) and give you a taste of the stuff that came out of their doors.

Mark’s Palatine Selection