Are your online friends really your friends?
Yesterday I read some rather horrible things written about me on the net, from someone I considered a friend. They were obviously angry with me (and some of that justified) and felt the need to vent on their blog.
Which is my little intro for something I’ve been thinking about for some time, and that is this new internet social network we have come to see as integral to our lives. And for most of us it is, I mean where else are writers, publishers, reviews, etc. all going to build up networks, find out about new markets, hear about new books, make new like-minded friends if not for the www?
But at times it comes with a price, as I’m sure we’ve all found out and surely nothing beats actually seeing these people and talking face to face, does it. I mean, does it?
Well funnily enough I have spoken to several people online who consider this a forum to be comfortable in, to be themselves, or at least who they would be if they weren’t socially uncomfortable and tended to freeze in pubic gatherings.
I am very much for meeting the people I work with, those that write for me, and those that I interact with on the net, to get a better sense of who they are, and to, quite simply, get to know them better.
Yet I know not all agree with me here and I accept that, for we are all different, all have our own comfort zones, and just as I feel much more comfortable chatting to people over a beer or a coffee, or even, failing that, Skype being the next best thing, I know some people would rather IM, tweet or blog.
My other reason for preferring the face-to-face contact is that I feel much more comfortable in future contact with the person, feeling that I have got a sense of who they are from our meeting and where our relationship/friendship lies. No matter how well I get on with somebody online, and there are a few reading this who I care deeply for, I always have that sense of dread that when I meet them, that our personalities are not going to match at all. I say this because it’s already happened and I say this because I am aware that not everybody is in person how they are online.
Even myself, I was shocked to find, when travelling to Australia, was told by a writer that they had even though they read my Live Journal, thought I was a bit of a dick (they may not have used those words but I do like to embellish!) yet meeting me in person thought I was quite nice really and even put the family up for one night on our five week journey through the country.
And very recently, on my last visit to England, one of the friends I met for the first time had been a little apprehensive, as even though he thought I was a nice guy, felt I was maybe a little ‘prickly’. He decided upon finally meeting me that I wasn’t prickly at all.
Here is where it’s tricky though, as I can definitely see myself as prickly and am a very reactive person, which not everyone takes to (for different reasons). However, I feel that I am this way when provoked, rather than when having a sit down chat with friends. Which is why I was similarly surprised when a friend round at ours the other week said I was a very calm person. Did she mean when I sit with friends and have a coffee and a chat (who isn’t then?).
Over the years online, first with IMs, Live Journal and Blogger, and later with Facebook, Twitter and Skype, I’ve met a lot of people and have tried to meet as many of those in person as I can, at cons, when visiting England, Australia (the US when I do next) and generally the people I meet match up to their online personas.
Meeting people like Amanda Pillar, Carole Johnstone, Lorna Johnstone, Mike Stone, Gary McMahon, Kaaron Warren, Robert Hood, Cat Sparks, Deborah Biancotti, Andrew McKiernan, Ross Temple, Nicole Murphy, Donna Hanson, Paul Finch, Joseph D’Lacey, Ian Whates, Chaz Brenchley, Peter Ball, Sharon Kae Reamer, Allyson Bird and many others has been a joy, and has made me feel like I actually know them much more than if we had just shared the odd e-mail back and forth.
I am aware that I have some pretty damn good online friends too, who I have yet to meet but the hope is that I can change that soon and lay those fears to rest.
I’m not sure I had a point here but was just curious about how the rest of you see this world of online communication – is it the bright new future, or is it all a bit scary?
The next stage in the whole to pay or not to pay for our writing…
…is to be found in a rather amusing play, in three acts:
Stokers 2009
Just read the preliminary shortlist for the Stokers 2009 and am over the moon to see Grants Pass in there!
Here’s the list: Stoker preliminary ballot
Great to see Kaaron Warren’s Slights in the novel section too!
Great News!
Well I’ve been wittering on about the virtues of a certain ‘new’ writer since I started at Morrigan Books and Carole Johnstone announced yesterday that she is to feature in Ellen Datlow’s Best Horror of the Year 2 with her tale Dead Loss from the cracking magazine Black Static.
I was first made aware of Carole when she sent a superb story, Scent, to In Bad Dreams volume two, which I snapped up immediately. She has then gone on to publish the short stories Sanctuary (Voices), The Discomfort of Words (Grants Pass), The Blind Man (Dead Souls) and The Harrowing (In the Footsteps of Gilgamesh – coming 2011), as well as the novella Frenzy from Eternal Press.
If you haven’t read her yet then make sure you do at the earliest opportunity!
Well deserved and so pleased for Carole!
New Year = resolution time
OK, I maybe should have added these a few days ago (15 mayhaps?) but as long as I’m actually working on them, then that’s the main thing.
Never was a big one for resolutions in the past but now see them as a way to see whether I think my life is plodding along as I want it to or whether I should think about things.
Basically when thinking about the resolutions, I try to avoid life-resolutions, which means those about things I have as a constant, like: eat healthier, be the best dad and husband I can, work hard with Morrigan Books, etc., unless I have real issues with any of these that I need to address.
But enough of all that and onto the resolutions I have set myself for 2010 (the wife asked me for ten this year, the loon!):
- Work on more music compilations – this is something I used to do a lot, an awful lot and something that I really miss when I’m not doing them. I used to spend hours in front of the stereo, choosing songs, putting them on tapes, and sending them off. Now it’s all so much easier with the computer and I do so few…go figure! I’ve actually already done one to hand out in March, when I visit blighty and I’m hoping to get some more done too!
- Write more non-fiction pieces – this is a big one for those who have been reading about my aim to write more fiction over the last few years and there was lots of thinking behind this over the holiday. I feel that I’ve been punishing myself for not writing more fiction, when in truth I’m feeling much more positive towards my non-fiction pieces: reviews (music, literature, film), articles and episodic commentaries. Expect to see much more of that this year (and yes, less fiction writing, if that is indeed possible)!
- Keep on top with the 40th Birthday bash plans – this one has not started well, as I’m a little behind with preliminary invitations but I need to focus, focus, focus.
- Read more – I did read quite a bit last year but nowhere near what I have done in previous years. That one needs changing and changing quick sharp.
- More contact with friends – I sort of disappeared a bit last year, what with a stressful year at Morrigan Books and Audrey’s first year but this year I want to make more time for friends, be it online chats, Skype calls or evenings with friends. I think this one has started off well, a few big chats both online and friends over and I need to keep up with this.
- Get the board games evenings up and running – this is one that I had a couple of years ago that went really well. Then when I don’t seem to have it as a resolution it disappears… Will be looking at getting the oft-talked about once a month gaming night over here, with preliminary chats for a Star Wars Risk night already underway!
- Learn to typset – I know I can, I just need a bit of time set aside and a whole lot of patience.
Sorry Etina, only seven this time around…
Time to vote – The Preditors and Editors Poll awaits!
I’ve been sitting back and watching goings on before getting ready for my own involvement in the awards, then realised there are only three days left…
If you think we did good work over at Morrigan Books last year, then this is your chance to vote for us, so that others can also see how well we are doing and cast a glance our way in 2010. We’ve already been nominated for a few things this time but if there is something you think of (short story, editor, etc.) that hasn’t been nominated then you can also do that.
The main voting page can be found below:
Preditors and Editors voting page
but I’ve given you a link to a few of the categories, with comments about who/what I think should win or who/what I’ve voted for.
I’ve not read enough here to have a qualified opinion but The Harrowing, Alexander Sokoloff is being talked about in all the right circles. I’m also aware Jeremy Shipp has a rather fine voice and would expect Cursed to be worth a buy.
Best Science Fiction/Fantasy Novel
I actually think this should be two sections but anyway…not read one on the list and struggle to think of any that were released last year that grabbed – I didn’t read many new novels though.
We have a few in this section, most coming from Dead Souls (my own little solo editing anthology). Tatsu by Reece Notley is riding high, as is Licwiglunga by T. A. Moore. Also in the list (from the same book) are A Shade of Yellow, Gary McMahon, Wayang Kulit, L. J. Hayward and The Blind Man, Carole Johnstone.
I’m only allowed to vote for one and so went for The Blind Man, as Carole Johnstone is always brilliant but this is easily one of the best things she’s ever done, and is probably my favourite of all those in the anthology. I read a lot of horror short stories last year and believe Carole’s stands very high among them all.
Best Science Fiction/Fantasy Short Story
There’s some bloody cracking stories in this list, and I notice a few from Grants Pass, our science fiction/horror anthology. I’m actually going to nominate KV Taylor’s Boudha, which isn’t in the list and was my favourite from that book (well that or Carole Johnstone’s…)
You may well notice a bit of bias here but I direct your attention to Dead Souls, the anthology I edited for Morrigan Books. If that didn’t grab you, you could vote for Grants Pass, another worthy anthology, also (strangely) published by Morrigan Books…
Both Dead Souls and Grants Pass are in there, both done by the wonderful Reece Notley. I shall be voting Dead Souls cause I love me that spider!
I see that Reece Notley has been nominated for Three Crow Press, yet I see no mention of Drops of Crimson, which I think will get my vote.
I can’t decide here between Carole Johnstone or Gary McMahon, as they’ve both done cracking stuff over the last year or so. I think I might vote Carole and get the wife to vote Gary, that seems fair eh? 
I’ve gone for Ian Hunter here, who is nice enough to put some of his stuff on his site. He reminds me I need to get some poetry done this year!
Reece Notley isn’t nominated, which makes no sense to me, and so I’ll be nominating her and then voting for her.
I’m in there, as is Amanda Pillar and Alisa Krasnostein. Can’t decide between Alisa or Amanda and so have let the wife vote for Alisa, seeing as she’s read some Twelth Planet stuff and I voted for my personal fave, Amanda Pillar.
No Jennifer Brozek though, which is strange.
Here we have Jennifer Brozek, Jenn Moffatt, Reece Notley and Lea Schizas, making it a very tough one. Think I’ll have to go for Reece Notley here.
We’ve been nominated here, which is crazy, as we don’t do ebooks, yet. I voted for Samhain Publishing.
I nominated Dark Wolf’s Fantasy Reviews for this and then got the wife to vote for ASif! (Australian Specific in focus). Covering all the bases you know…
I’m thinking Shroud, Necrotic Tissue and Three Crow Press here. No prizes for guessing where my vote has to go.
Goblin Fruit, without a shadow of a doubt!
My vote goes with The Muse Online Writers’ Conference. I was lucky enough to take part last year and it was excellent!
And here is where you can see the current standings and just where everyone is at the mo.
Looking forward to seeing where we end up in all our categories!
Stuck in the TV screen
Things have been rather hectic of late and I’m finding that going through TV shows has been a good way to take a break here and there. Here’s a little summary of what I’ve been watching recently:
Merlin (Season Two): I was all doom and gloom about this one when I watched the first two episodes of season one but stuck with it (for reasons unknown) and it’s grown on me somewhat. I do think some of the stories are quite well crafted and I think it does OK for a children’s/family show. I’m on episode twelve of season two and I think that means there is one episode left.
Dexter (Season Four): I have just finished the fourth season of easily one of the best TV shows ever made. The finale of this one had me in agony and I still haven’t fully recovered from all the implications of it (and it was Monday night I watched it). It’s compelling TV, excellent writing and with some wonderful characters.
Lie to Me (Season One): I’ve actually watched all of season one but am watching it again with the wife and am up to episode four (of twelve) with her. It’s nice to go away from what I’m used to watching and Tim Roth is excellent as the owner of a company that deals with micro-expressions, which tell us who is lying and why…
V (Season One): A remake of the massive 80’s tv show and with a weird idea from the channel of showing four episodes and then having a four month break. Especially when that fourth episode had no discernable cliffhanger to speak of… It’s a bit tired, a bit lethargic and suffers from being a remake that wasn’t really needed. I’ll probably keep up with mainly as that lovely Juliet from LOST is in it.
Dollhouse (Season One): Struggling muchly with this one. I’m on episode nine just now and think that of those 9×50min slots there is probably about 40mins of good TV. I think Whedon has some good ideas but he’s ultimately so far up his own arse that he’s unwilling to look at a lot of the flaws in what he’s doing. In this comment I also refer to Firefly and Buffy.
LOST (Season Five): Season five was just about to start by the time I got around to watching season one of this and I basically raced through the series in an attempt to catch up and be in the ‘in-crowd’ for when they started the last season. I was negative to this for so long, after hearing about so many people dropping off the show and it was only when my sister said she was going to watch them again, as she’d missed a few episodes, and would I watch them with her and chat about them. I took a bit of convincing and the result was one of my favourite TV shows ever made. I’m worried they are going to royally mess it up, like they did BSG but I trust them just now…
Supernatural (Season Five): Have enjoyed this all the way through, although I cannot really claim to be a fan as it deals with horror in a way I don’t usually appreciate – that of lots of humour – and I miss the fact it used to be quite a tense horror show in the beginning (somewhere). Anyway it’s kept me entertained enough to watch for five years now.
Next on my list to watch is Six Feet Under, and considering the list above, are there any opinions on whether I’m going to like it? (This is also bearing in mind that I gave up on Heroes, Pushing Daises and I absolutely hated the end of BSG?)
Eight years on
Well it’s been eight years to the day since we tied the knot and in that time there has been much to enjoy and much to deal with. Obvious high points are the births of both our children, our many trips together and the support we have received from each other in all things artistic, health related and career choices.
The two very obvious low points being my mother’s lost battle against cancer four months before Maddoc was born and the murder of my brother-in-law, in December 2007.
And now we’re eight years on…
A rare event is when the wife surprises me, yet that has been the nature of our relationship over recent months, with her trying to surprise me in both little and big ways. Today’s was calling me this morning to tell me I had to leave home and get over the gym as soon as possible as one of the wheels had fallen off the pram. She couldn’t fix it and so I would have to. I cycled over, only to find the pram in full working order and a grinning wife letting me know that we were off for coffee (Latte and pepparkakor cheesecake please)!
Been mulling about doing work-related stuff this afternoon before getting ready for my first innebandy game in about four years now – very much looking forward to that one, especially as the wife is involved too! We are then off to Indra, a new Indian restaurant in our very own Norrköping.
Some days are just too good!
Tough decision on new books
It was a decision I had to make, one that was hard in the making but one that I have to stick to. I have made a promise to myself not to buy any new books until December 2010 for two very important reasons: the first is due to the work I’ve been doing in the flat over the week in packing, organising and moving around 400 books or so up into our attic storage space in an attempt to get the flat back to looking like a home, rather than a storage warehouse. The second choice is a simple case of economy.
I know this is going to kill me, especially when thinking about the chat I had with Michael Stone the other week about buying stuff by friends and contacts, partly out of interest, partly out of support. I have always been big on the argument that as an indie press publisher I can’t complain about people not buying our books if I’m not buying other people’s and I have made a point of buying books by a lot of the people I have worked with.
However, this means I can actually start reading some of those I bought and that can’t be all bad can it?
I decided to put a little list together so you can see what is on my list over the next few weeks/months. I may add to this a little later but these are the ones I’m going to start with:
Fourtold: Michael Stone
Lowside of the Road – A Life of Tom Waits: Barney Hoskyns
Innocent When You Dream – Tom Waits – The Collected Interviews: Mac Montandon (ed.)
Beneath the Surface: Simon Strantzas (only a couple left to read – an excellent collection)
Creeping in Reptile Flesh: Robert Hood
The Mammoth Book of Best New Horror: Stephen Jones (ed.)
Collected Works: Nick Wallace (ed.) (I’m in this!)
The Manhattan Project: Jake Packard (promised to read and review it and am halfway through it – not enjoying it at all)
Fantastic Wonder Stories: Russell B. Farr (ed.) (About two thirds into this)
Troy: Simon Brown
Bull Running For Girls: Allyson Bird
Crosstown Traffic: Stuart Coupe, Julie Ogden & Robert Hood (eds.)
Hanteringen av odöda: John Ajvide Lindqvist
Year’s Best Australian SF & Fantasy – Volume Two: Bill Congreve & Michelle Marquardt (eds.) (Think I’ve read most of this)
I’m sure whilst organising the last of the books I’ll find more but for now that’s my list.
And yes, I found the other pile just a few moments ago…
Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell: Susanna Clarke
The Lions of Al-Rassan: Guy Gavriel Kay
The Priestess and the Slave: Jenny Blackford
Bound for Evil: Tom English (ed.)
Svavelvinter: Erik Granström
Behold the Spider! Dead Souls available on Amazon.com.
Dead Souls is now available through both the Morrigan Books website and Amazon.com.
Be sure to scare the bejeezus out of your nearest and dearest this Halloween by gifting them with some wonderful tales, penned by expert storytellers.
And a cover to make you squirm whenever you reach for your copy!
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